She didn’t realise this was happening until our first workshop together. She originally thought that all the self-development work she was reading, and leadership podcasts she was listening to was motivating but added a pressure, or an expectation that she didn’t really believe she could live up to.

All this happened as she seemed to forget that she could live up to being a great leader, especially as she was recently appointed to a highly visible, leadership role. A role that all in her recruitment process already believed she was capable of.

Comparison is a thief and I believe that. It steals your confidence in yourself by diluting your value as you increase your desire for another version. This happens so discreetly you do not realise it’s impact until you're stuck in a position thinking, where did my confidence go, or who am I to be here?

But she wasn’t comparing herself to others. She admired their work, learned from their example, and applied methods she saw that worked for them. Yet, she felt imposter syndrome and worked with me to shake this off, reclaim her confidence, and grow more into her leadership communication style.

While she didn’t compare herself to others, she compared herself to an older version of herself.

The past wins, lessons, communication approaches, vibe, all of that she compared with where she was now. Yet the current situation was completely new, even though the role was similar to her past roles.

There is now newer technology and different ways to apply it, even though elements of it seem similar to past technologies introduced to corporate environments. There are different levels of stresses her team and company are experiencing, and a strong undercurrent of exhaustion from all the changes and uncertainty to work with.

As her realisation of her comparing herself to an older version of herself became clearer, that clarity gave us the opportunity to work on techniques and methods to translate her past experience into her new context.

Yes, the first step is to stop comparing yourself to an older version of you, so you may do the next step, use methods, frameworks, and techniques to translate that experience into where you are now. This is how you grow into your new version of yourself, and the positive consequence is your confidence experiences compounded growth, which spreads into other areas of your life.

Her greatest discovery working with me was not the knowledge of the techniques, methods, skills etc…this we both knew was easily accessible in books, through AI, podcasts, and You Tube videos. It was me guiding and teaching her ways to apply them so they fit her natural communication style.

By week three of her 12 week program with me, she was already growing into newer goals as this application of the practice fast tracked her process. A result she said was “way better than my past experience of it taking months of me trying to figure it out all by myself to only feel okay. Now I feel great, and taller, which I love because I do not feel like I need to wear heels.”

It is the revealing of the blind spots, and discovering ways to apply what is known in a way that is aligned with you, that is a value I believe is priceless. It speeds up your movement to a goal, and it creates moments for you to enjoy the process and release the stress. And why not invest in that for yourself. Please subscribe for more about courage to communicate through change, or continue the conversation with me here.

All the best, Susan.